Are you still chasing that dream? Wishin’ and Hopin’ don’t cut it. Getting what you want takes Seein’ and Doin’. And that’s what we’re all about:

· Who: Carolyn Stephens & Vivian Shimoyama*

· What: Permission to Dream Workshop

· Why: Because if you can dream it, you can do it.

· When: Saturday, January 23, 2010, 11 AM – 2 PM

· Where: Laurie’s Loft – “Where creativity happens.”

5820 Pioneer Avenue; Las Vegas 89146

This is your “Permission to Dream” and create your 2010 Strategy to Get What You Want!

Join us for a few hours of fun – but not just fun. This three-hour workshop will help you set your sights on what you want to achieve in the coming year. In this energy filled event, you will create your own Vision 2010, using the Permission to Dream Journal created by Femail Creations founder, best selling author and inspiring speaker Lisa Hammond.

But wait – there’s more! There’s lunch! A delicious luncheon catered by Donna Pressel of Chef on the Run (yes, there will be piles and piles of her famous scones) will give you the fuel you need to get your creativity into high gear. But make no mistake, you’ll be there to work and devote some highly directed energy toward making 2010 one of the best years you’ve lived yet.

You’ll be busy for three hours:

• Creating your own visual personal mission statement for 2010
• Choosing words that represent your intentions for 2010
• Browsing magazines for pictures, words, phrases that are meaningful to you and cutting them out
• Pasting these magazine cuttings into your journal that represents your target for 2010 and beyond
• Enjoying the company of bright, motivated and creative women- just like you!

Participation is limited to just 15, so register today. For just $47 you’ll get a “visioning starter kit” containing:

• Your own copy of Lisa’s fabulous dream journal
• All the supplies you need to get started
• A set of affirmation cards to keep you on track
• A surprise gift

And, of course, lunch!

Magazines will be provided, but if there is something special you dream about (like a motorcycle) feel free to bring your own.

RSVP today – you don’t want to be left out. Just reply to carolyn@herestogirlfriends.com so we can save your seat. Payment options will be included with your reservation confirmation.

*Carolyn Stephens has lived and worked in Las Vegas for over 30 years. A founding member of the Southern Nevada Chapter of National Association of Women Business Owners, she has twice been honored by the SBA for championing the cause of women in business. She currently serves as a mentor to women business owners through her mastermind group The Inner Circle.

*Vivian Shimoyama divides her time between Las Vegas and Southern California. She is the founder and president of Breakthru Unlimited. Vivian is recognized nationally & internationally for her advocacy work for small business and women in business. She also created “Glass with a Cause” jewelry which has been worn by women such as Hillary Clinton and Elizabeth Dole and is featured in Madeleine Albright’s book Read My Pins.

This one is for all my blogging Girlfriends, especially Nerdette

I don't know if I'm happy or sad. I'm pleased that young women are still (or again) taking stands and I love this new "power tool" the blog. I'm sad that we're still doing it after all these years. It was 1962 when I almost got kicked out of a conservative Southern University (redundancy?) for speaking out for a woman's right to at least have the option of both a family and a career. Oh, the horror.

And if that weren't heresy enough, that same year I jumped on the bandwagon driven by Sherri Finkbine, the woman who made headlines by planning to abort a fetus that was grossly deformed because she had taken the drug Thalidomide. Ms. Finkbine wasn't planning to become a poster girl for reproductive rights; she just wanted other women of child bearing age to know about the dangers of the drug. Then the shit hit the proverbial fan and she was forced to fly to Sweden for the procedure. Fast forward - let's see 2009 minus 1962 = WAY TOO LONG! Idiots are still murdering doctors who perform legal medical procedures and railing against women who think that those decisions should be nobody's business but their own, with the advice of a physician not a politician.

And don't even get me started on the misuse of the terms "Pro-Life" and "Pro-Abortion". I much prefer the more genteel phrase "get your effing filthy mind out of my bedroom".

But I digress.

Every day some new issue makes me shake my head in disbelief because I thought we'd put that one behind us. I'm looking at pictures of Sonia Sotomayor and a little voice is whispering in my ear "Clarence Thomas". He's my lowest common denominator for getting onto the Supreme Court - an unqualified womanizer who stared down his brave female accuser. Now a wholly qualified woman is being accused of thinking that the wisdom of her gender and ethnicity might possibly be an asset in serving on the court. The nerve!

I can't even bear to write, let alone think, about hate crimes again LGBT citizens. My precious step-son, a young man I adore, is gay. If anyone harms a hair on his chest because of his sexual orientation I will not rest until that individual is in some kind of hell - preferably a living one. Don't mess with me! I may be old but I'm ornery.

Daily Kos: State of the Nation

Mother's Day was originally started after the Civil War, as a protest to the carnage of that war, by women who had lost their sons. Here is the original Mother's Day Proclamation from 1870:

Arise, then, women of this day! Arise all women who have hearts,
whether our baptism be that of water or of fears!

Say firmly: "We will not have great questions decided by
irrelevant agencies. Our husbands shall not come to us, reeking
with carnage, for caresses and applause. Our sons shall not be
taken from us to unlearn all that we have been able to teach
them of charity, mercy and patience.

We women of one country will be too tender of those of another
country to allow our sons to be trained to injure theirs. From
the bosom of the devastated earth a voice goes up with our own.
It says "Disarm, Disarm! The sword of murder is not the balance
of justice."

Blood does not wipe our dishonor nor violence indicate possession.
As men have often forsaken the plow and the anvil at the summons
of war, let women now leave all that may be left of home for a
great and earnest day of counsel. Let them meet first, as women,
to bewail and commemorate the dead.

Let them then solemnly take counsel with each other as to the
means whereby the great human family can live in peace, each
bearing after their own time the sacred impress, not of Caesar,
but of God.

In the name of womanhood and of humanity, I earnestly ask that a
general congress of women without limit of nationality may be
appointed and held at some place deemed most convenient and at
the earliest period consistent with its objects, to promote the
alliance of the different nationalities, the amicable settlement
of international questions, the great and general interests of
peace.

Julia Ward Howe
Boston
1870

We call ourselves the Board of Directors. Whenever any one of us has a serious, potentially life changing issue, we call a meeting. We also "meet" on birthdays, and last night to exchange holiday gifts and gossip. We are four friends who met through NAWBO, the National Association of Women Business Owners. Now we are as close as sisters - maybe closer. The oldest is in her late sixties and the youngest is in her fifties. It's a nice span of time and experience.

As hard as we tried, we could not stop the conversation from continually returning to the economy. We are all fearful. A sign of the times is that in the past we would have met at a posh restaurant and treated ourselves to cocktails and a lovely dinner which would probably have included wine and dessert. We would have exchanged gifts from some of the fabulous stores we have here in Las Vegas. Last night we met in Cindy's warm comfortable home, sitting around a wood fire sipping champagne and exchanging token gifts that cost little or nothing. And it was great.

Sheila is the oldest in the group and she always shares memories of growing up in New York, the youngest of a very large and very poor Irish family. They are funny stories. Actually, hilarious. She makes being broke sound like fun. Her stories also serve as a reminder that we are actually very fortunate now.

I left with a warm "hugged" feeling that lasted all the way home.

These are my Girlfriends. I'm pretty sure we can make it through anything together. There is a love so deep and a bond so tight, we will always be there for each other. There are all kinds of love, but the one between and among Girlfriends is unlike any other. It's a precious gift.

Idle hands are the devil's tools. That's an old, old  saying with versions going all the way back to Chaucer in English literature and even further back in other cultures. When I decided to write today about women's hands, I found so many wonderful pictures, I thought I might not even use any words. The more I searched, the more I realized how many aspects of our lives are defined by hands. Our earliest form of communication is to wave "bye bye". Shortly afterward, we raise our hands to go potty. Then later when we know the answer. We hold hands with our girlfriends and later with our boyfriends. It used to be that a suitor would ask for a young lady's hand in marriage. Now they don't ask - frequently they don't even marry. Just hang out or hook up. Holding hands can mean safety. "Hold my hand when we cross the street." Hopefully as we pass from this life, there will be someone holding our hand right up until the end.

Now I've gotten somewhat off  track. I meant to write about women's hands and how they are rarely idle. When I was a little girl growing up in Georgia, all the women I knew kept their hands busy all the time. Once all the household chores were done and they sat down to rest for a bit, they would pick up something from the mending basket beside the chair. They didn't throw out things that were ripped or torn, They mended them and if the patch didn't exactly match the garment they became work clothes or play clothes. (I never saw anybody actually darn a sock, though.) Once the garment was beyond repair, there might be a few good scraps left to sew with other scraps and make a piece quilt. A rite of passage from childhood to womanhood was to be "allowed" to help shell peas. Women sat in a circle, bags of peas beside their chairs and big bowls in their laps, and passed the the time sharing bits of gossip and wisdom. There's a lot to be learned shelling peas.

A woman can hold a book in one hand and rock a cradle or push a swing with the other. Today's woman finishes her day job, whatever that might entail, and then sits down to knock out a few blog posts sharing her thoughts with a much wider world. I am constantly awed by the diversity and depth of the so called "mommy bloggers" who write about everything from potty training to politics.

Girlfriends will reach out a hand of help even when you didn't know you needed one.

March is "Women's History Month" and it's very important to remember our roots, but the information coming out this month could save your life.

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month, http://nbcam.org/. I'm concerned that with so much pink stuff around all the time, women may be tuning out the message. That message is, EARLY DETECTION IS THE KEY TO SURVIVAL. Despite what you may have heard, self-examination is still important. As are regular mammograms. Thanks to the love of a devoted sister, the legacy of Susan G. Komen is a heightened awareness that is difficult to ignore. Think Pink!

October is also National Domestic Violence Awareness Month, http://www.womenshealth.gov/violence/. An interesting new program this year is to give hairdressers and manicurists information about resources for women in abusive situations. Just displaying brochures at their stations may be all it takes for a client to find the lifeline she needs.

Ask the people who want your vote how they stand on increased funding for cancer research and for programs to give abused women the safety they need and deserve. Don't settle for vague answers - insist on specifics. Be a pest!

At least not the last time I checked. Although what with global warming and climate change and such it might not be too far off. I never intended for this to become a political blog but I just thought I saw a pig fly over so maybe it's time to make a few observations about the craziness known as our election season. Don't get me wrong, I actually love politics. I miss the Good Old Days when the conventions were real contests and you didn't know who the nominees were going to be until the roll call vote. My heroes were Huntley & Brinkley. One of the first things I ever watched on our neighbor's black and white TV was the nomination of Dwight Eisenhower.

Now, being raised in the South in the 50s and 60s, I was naturally a Democrat because as one of my college professors pointed out, "Republican was the party of Lincoln!" It didn't matter that everyone was as conservative as all get out, they were not going to join that party. But times have changed and you'd be hard pressed to find a liberal Democrat anywhere in my neck of the woods. The South did not rise again, so they sighed and registered as Republicans so at least they had the same philosophy as the party they supported.

Not me, though. Somewhere, somehow I became a bleeding heart liberal and I continue to be one to this day. When I look back and remember that my first topic in Speech 101 (a required course for my major) was "A Woman's Right to a Career" I wonder where that idea came from. (Don't laugh, young ladies. I almost got run out of town on a rail for that one.) I was raised to be a wife and mother and the college degree was just something to "fall back on" - you know like if the husband I was sure to have had a heart attack or something and I was forced to support the family. Or, as actually happened, the sonofabitch left me and I had to find a J-O-B.

Where am I going with this? I'm getting there. My point, and I do have one, is that I've had a really hard time with this election cycle. After years of having maybe one good candidate, this year almost every single Democratic candidate was great - or had some great ideas. And to make matters worse, one of them was a woman. Oh, the turmoil. My sons immediately cast their lots with the nice young black man with the vision. I retaliated by casting mine for the candidate who is almost exactly my own age, Chris Dodd, defender of the Constitution. I first met his wife and then Chris and their two little girls and was totally won over. But it was not to be. He pulled out right after the Iowa caucus. Shortly after, by an amazing stroke of luck, I was able to actually meet Hillary Clinton. Her ideas were so much in line with my own regarding health care and small business, that it wasn't difficult to switch my allegiance. But once again the fickle finger of fate flipped me a bird and now I'm supporting that nice young black man (and his very impressive wife). OMG, my grandmother would totally rise up from her grave if she knew. I could tell you stories ...

Here's the thing. Several years ago I was flying home from a public policy conference in D.C. and struck up a conversation with the young man sitting next to me. He said he thought all business owners were Republicans and asked how I could be in business and be a Democrat. I explained that I am first and foremost a human being, second a woman, third a wife and mother, and fourth a business owner. So that puts "business owner" pretty far down the list. I have to vote for the guy (or gal) who I believe has my best interests at heart.

I have a healthy respect for anyone whose ideas are opposed to mine as long as they are sincere and well thought out, but I have no use for knee-jerk reactions. As Voltaire is attributed with saying (but did not), "I disapprove of what you say but I will defend to the death your right to say it." If you are ever going to speak your mind, now is the time to do it.

REGISTER AND VOTE!!!!!

Once upon a time we thought that "disaster preparedness" meant having a few jugs of water, a flashlight, some cans of beans and a manual can opener. Since then we have been up close and personal with sobering events such as Hurricane Katrina and the more recent fires in Southern California that caused most of us to re-think how well prepared we actually are. What would you do if everything you've come to count on every day was gone. I mean gone! If something happened this very afternoon, do you have enough gas in your car to drive to safety? No going to the nearest convenience store to fill up. The store is gone. No running to the ATM for cash - that's gone, too. And even if they haven't been destroyed, with no electricity they don't work. Most of us are better prepared for a trip to Grandma's than for a natural disaster.

The Department of Homeland Security has a handy website, www.ready.gov. This year the goals of National Preparedness Month (NPM) 2008 are:

• Get a kit
• Make a Plan
• Be Informed
• Get Involved

There is so much great information on the website including Ready America for home and family, Ready Business and a Ready Kids video.

Being prepared means being ready for any kind of emergency from a hurricane to a power outage to a manmade disaster, such as an explosion. Last month a propane plant exploded in Toronto. My Twitter Friend, Franke James, describes it and her thoughts afterward in her marvelously illustrated blog. I was reminded of the PEPCON explosion near Las Vegas on May 4, 1988. (My goodness, has it been that long?) Just because we don't live in Tornado Alley doesn't mean we are immune!

This information is so important, I'm going to post it on The Sensible Shopper, too, with some suggestions about buying the supplies needed for your emergency kit.

Because this story includes some important life lessons, my dear friend Bea has agreed to share it. I asked her how she is coping after the death of her beloved sister, Lanie. Following is her reply:

Doing okay, but the sorrow comes and goes. I guess I'm following "text book" grief stages. At first I was absolutely heartbroken, then numb. Really shut down numb. Last week depressed, like I was walking through molasses. Some days tears, some days fine. Overall let's face it, it sucks losing my only sister and my best friend! I've always said that Lanie and my husband Bob held all of my "emotional eggs” in their baskets. Now Bob is the sole keeper of the emotional eggs. Our parents passed in '95 and '98 at the very young ages of 58 and 63. Now Lanie has passed at 52 and I am the sole remainder of my family of origin which is weird and sad.

The drug interaction is an important story to tell. Lanie took Paxil as an antidepressant. She took it upon herself to up her dosage because she didn't feel like it was working. Then she had some kind of drug interaction - we're not sure what it was with. This drug can interact with St. John's Wort, which a lot of folks take as a natural anti-depressant, or something as inane as over-the-counter cough syrup. She developed a condition called "Serotonin Syndrome." The purpose of Paxil and other "SRRI" type anti-depressants is to cause your body to create serotonin which naturally enhances well being. But too much of it causes what Lanie experienced. Her limbs locked up and got rigid and then she started having seizures. The doctors in the ER gave her sedatives to stop the seizures because the seizures are "like running a marathon while standing still" and can cause the individual's muscles to burn up and resultant kidney damage. Because she was conscious when she went into the ER, it was the expectation that she would just "wake up" after the serotonin naturally cleansed itself from her body.

Obviously, that didn't happen. When she showed signs that the serotonin was wearing off (less rigidity in her limbs) but she was not waking up they did further tests and realized she had had a major brain-stem stroke which would have left her a vegetable.

Imagine the personal anguish her adult children and I went through going from the "she'll wake up" diagnosis to "she will be a vegetable", all in the course of a few days and all completely preventable by adhering to the prescribed dose of her medicine and not mixing it with other drugs. You're right Carolyn - others can benefit by knowing about this!

Ultimately, as the sister and "Aunt Bea,” I helped walk Lanie's kids through the choices we had to face. Lanie had a living will (another important aspect of the story) and had expressed to all of us that she would have never wanted to "live" that way. But still - such a painful week and a painful decision - to allow my sister to be released from the body that was no longer supporting her. Lanie and I both held the belief that "our bodies are simply the car that drives our soul around earth” and that we are "spiritual beings having a human experience." Lanie's car was worn out - but her soul continues.

In case you missed them, here are but a few of the important lessons in Bea’s sad yet beautiful story:

• Everyone’s story of grief is different – and also the same.
• Having a Living Will is one of the most valuable gifts you can give to your loved ones.
• Beyond the words on paper, it’s important to share your feelings about life and death.
• Don’t mess around with medications. Dosages of prescription medication are calculated for a reason. Don’t change them without talking to your doctor.
• Even the most common over-the-counter medication can have serious side effects when mixed with other drugs. When you pick up a bottle of cough medicine or even an herbal remedy, buy it at the drugstore where your prescriptions are filled. Step up to the counter and ask the pharmacist about possible interaction with what you are taking. My pharmacist has saved my life more than once.

And finally, we are all stronger than we think we are. You can and you will step up in a crisis and do what needs to be done. There is a familiar, often quoted and frequently misquoted saying "A woman is like a tea bag; you never know how strong it is until it's in hot water.” Close enough.

A couple of years ago my son went to a New Media conference called South by Southwest Interactive or SXSWI as it's called by those in the know. The conference takes place every year in Austin, TX. In case you haven't heard, Austin is "weird" and proud of it. You can buy shirts that say "Keep Austin Weird" and I'm not making this up. So I think that's why they meet there. Anyway, I usually keep up with him by exchanging email and reading his blog. That's motherhood in the 21st century. His blog said that he would not be checking email while at the conference, but that he would be available on Twitter. Oh, great. Just about the time I thought I had learned enough about social media to get me by in most situations, here comes another thing. I got a Twitter account so I could follow him at SXSWI. "Following" someone on Twitter means that you can view their short (140 characters) posts and if they so choose, they can view yours. I further embarrassed my grown son by signing up with the screen name "wadesmom" so everyone in his inner circle knew that his mother was checking up on him. I followed Wade through the conference and then started following a few of the more interesting people on his list. Then, much to my surprise, some of them started following me back! I was feeling pretty important until I found out that some Twitterers (I call them Twits) have their accounts set up to automatically follow anyone who signs up to follow them, so I guess Barack Obama didn't say, "Hey look, it's Wade's Mom; she's so cool." I was crushed.

So now I have my own little circle of Twitter friends, and I've become quite fond of them. There is Deb Puchalla, Editor in Chief at Martha Stewart's Everyday Food. Erin Kotecki Vest posts as The Queen of Spain and she has podcasts called "inquisitions". Aliza Sherman is a legend on the Internet. She is the original Cybergrrl. Now she lives in Alaska, but I don't think she's all that crazy about it. Last week her baby was running a fever and the advice was flowing in from moms all over the country. The Stirrup Queen blogs about the emotional roller coaster of infertility tests and treatments. I've been there and done that, so I totally relate. I have to thank one of my favorite authors and speakers, Dan Pink, for introducing me to two fabulous women, Franke James and Gretchen Rubin. Franke's "green" blog is not only entertaining, it's visually stimulating because she is a fabulous illustrator. Gretchen's Happiness Project is a joy to read. SoCalMom was my first Twitter friend. I can't even remember how we "met". Her name is Donna Schwartz Mills and she blogs about being a mom over 50. I say, "Better her than me!"

Now I'm hooked. Every morning after I check my email, I check Twitter. I worry when my girlfriends aren't posting - where could they be? Is everything all right? Did anyone hear from Aliza; how is the baby? I can't wait to read Gretchen's regular Wednesday post and happiness tip. And, of course, there is the awesomely talented and irreverent Heather Armstrong and her popular blog Dooce.com. Her readers expect something funny or poignant every single day, and she rarely disappoints. A lot of these women gathered in San Francisco last month for the BlogHer conference. I was so jealous. When they asked for votes about locations for next year,  I said "Please, please come to Vegas." Wherever they meet, I'm hoping to be there. Next month is the second Blog World Expo and it is here in Vegas. I went last year and tried to act like I understood what everyone was talking about. This year I can at least appear to be somewhat knowledgeable and I can say "why yes, I have a blog and of course I'm on Twitter". Maybe I will meet some of my online Girlfriends. Will they be like I imagined? Will they be shocked to learn that I'm old enough to be their mother? I could hide under the cloak of anonymity - one thing I've never posted on Twitter is my picture!